Survivors of domestic and emotional abuse can be re-victimized by the very institutions meant to keep them safe
By Shamecca Brown-Granite State News Collaborative
Across New Hampshire, too many survivors of domestic and emotional abuse find themselves battling not only their abusers but also the very system that is supposed to protect them. Within family and civil courts, survivors often describe experiences that leave them feeling unheard, dismissed, or even penalized for speaking their truth.
In many of these cases, emotional and psychological abuse – forms of harm that can be just as damaging as physical violence – are not always recognized or taken seriously. When this happens, it sends a discouraging message to victims: that their pain isn’t valid unless it can be seen.
Advocates across the state have long called attention to what they describe as gaps in understanding trauma within the justice system. These gaps can lead to inconsistent rulings, particularly in custody disputes and domestic cases where manipulation, intimidation, or financial control are involved. Survivors report feeling trapped in drawn-out legal battles that exhaust their resources and prolong their suffering.
Organizations such as 603 Legal Aid, the DOVE Project, and the N.H. Coalition Against Domestic and Sexual Violence work tirelessly to assist victims, but their capacity is limited. Many survivors discover that even after reaching out for help, the options available often address immediate safety, such as shelter, while long-term legal protection and financial recovery remain out of reach.
The term “legal abuse” has been used by some advocates to describe how abusers may exploit court processes to maintain control, using litigation as another form of intimidation. It’s a cycle that continues to harm those already affected by trauma and can erode public trust in the fairness of the system.
Fairness is not a privilege
To create lasting change, New Hampshire’s legal system must continue to evolve. Training for judges, guardians ad litem and other court professionals on the dynamics of trauma and emotional abuse is essential. Stronger oversight, improved access to legal representation, and policies that recognize all forms of abuse, not just physical, would ensure a more balanced and compassionate approach to justice.
Justice should not depend on who has more resources, more time or more influence. It should reflect truth, fairness and accountability. Survivors deserve a system that listens, understands and protects, not one that leaves them to fight their battles alone.
Behind every case file is a real person, someone trying to rebuild their life and find peace. We owe it to them and to the idea of justice itself to make sure no one feels invisible when they step into a courtroom. Fairness should never be a privilege; it should be a right.
Shamecca Brown is a New Hampshire-based columnist who is family-oriented and passionate about serving underserved communities. Her advocacy extends to a range of social issues, with a strong commitment to supporting survivors of domestic and sexual violence.These articles are being shared by partners in the Granite State News Collaborative. For more information, visit collaborativenh.org.